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Jung Und Frei [Young and Free] Chapter 5


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#1 Sullomizer

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Posted 15 March 2010 - 01:27 PM

Chapter 5

Bill brought me breakfast and bed the next morning. There were flowers on the tray from Nox and Jett, who had been out in Simone’s garden with Adele. She was living here now. Bill made me a carmel macchiato, as a symbol of our first meeting. When I had stupidly spilled one on him in the New York Airport. He sat next to me and ate my grapes. Later in the morning, after saying goodbye to the boys for a short while, we went to the studio, where the guys decieded what song they would sing. I hadn’t seen Georg for a while, he met up with us there. He said he’d stop by sometime to see the boys with his girlfriend. I hung out on the comfy black leather couches in the snack room, with a guitar and some paper, just noodling around while the guys were in a meeting and a recording session with their workers.

They came back in for a coffee break, Bill sat down next to me with a bag of skittles and offered me some. I declined, wanting to show him a making of a song.
“New? Let me hear.” He said, settling back onto the couch and watching me. I strummed a few chords.
“You walk away, and I try to hold onto your arm. No matter what we went though, I try to keep you from leaving me here…”
“I hit the wall! I’m slammed, like rock so hard, it digs into the skin! I choke back, everything…and fall…in the dust…here.”
“In our memories…I’m surrounded by the…shattered remains that we had! I want to spit in your face—I want to let go! Of all this and fall…and let you know…it’s all my fault…”
“I will reach for the feeling of green grass, but all I feel is the dark! I come back to—a sudden reality, where you have such tasteless anger…”
Everyone was watching me now, gaping.
“Your cold eyes stare down at me, you try to hold yourself back…from hurting everyone again…and I want to let go…of all this…but don’t leave me…here to die…in the dark…”
Silence.
“Was it really that bad?” I winced out loud.
Silence.
“Say something…” I muttered, putting the guitar down and got up to get coffee.
People starting talking again to each other.
“I MENT TO ME, PEOPLE!” I yelled, slamming the coffee cup onto a table. Tom came up to me.
“You have so much anger…” he said, eyeing the hot coffee, like I might dump it on his head any second.
“Yeah, well, things make me angry. I’m half Irish! I have a short fuse!”
He wagged a finger at me.
“Ah, ah, ah! That my dear, is a sterotype. I thought you hated those. It’s like saying that Germans have the best bands!” He paused for dramatic effect. “Oh wait, that’s true!”
“That’s not a sterotype, you smarta$$...” I grumbled, pissy now. “That’s the truth.”
He laughed. “Then tell me, what is a sterotype?”
“Okay let me see…wearing black is emo or goth, Californians are all surfers, Alaskans live in igloos!”
“Wait, Alaskans don’t live in igloos?”
I stared at him.
“Okay. I can’t tell if you’re being serious or not.”
His face remained blank.
I turned to Bill, who had still not said anything, but was staring at me with a look of respect, awe, love, and fear…I think.
“Bill. Please tell me your brother knows the basic fundimental commen knowledge of life.”
Bill shook himself out of his reverie.
“Nope. He knows nothing. Zilch!” He winked at me.
Tom flipped him off. I smacked him with whatever happened to be at hand. Which happened to be a Playboy magazine on the table. He grabbed it.
“Give me that! You’ll ruin the centerfold…”
“You sicken me, oh commitment phobic man…” I sipped my coffee.
“You scare me, oh psychotic screaming frau…” he shot back flipping though the magazine. Georg snickered. I raised an eyebrow.
“Do you want this coffee to be in your lap and out of the cup? Because, I can make that happen. Trejectory and gravity make that possible you know.”

From well behind a large potted plant Tom muttered “Ooooh, I’m scared now…”
That did it. I was mad from Tom being an idiot, and no one telling me whether my song sucked or not. I marched off to Tom’s laptop case. He noticed me walking in a general pointed direction.
“Alec…where are you going?”
Noticing what lay in my path…
“ALEC! OKAY, OKAY! I LIKED YOUR SONG IT WAS GOOD, NOW PLEASE DON’T DUMP COFFEE ON MY COMPUTER!!!!”
I held the cup over the open bag. The rest of the band, and some of the studio guys were cracking up.
“Why?” I asked sweetly.
“Because all my music is on there...” he said lamely
“Wrong. I happen to know that you have a backup hard drive for all your music. Now, what’s on here that’s so important? Your porn?”
“Why are you always assuming, because I’m a single guy, that I have porno on my laptop?”
“It’s basic fundimental common knowledge.” I said, tipping the cup a little bit.
“Alec!”
“Tell me!”
“Alec, really, please…”
“Tell me, Tom!”
“FINE! There are pictures of the twins on there that I don’t want to loose, alright? There are pictures on there that you don’t have! Great ones! And I don’t want them gone, okay?! I haven’t had time to back them up!” he yelled at me, chucking the Playboy magazine into a corner. Georg went and picked it up, flipped through it, and sat down with Gustav at his shoulder. Guys…really…
I was speechless. I almost dropped the cup. I remembered just in time, though. Of course, the fact that he had pictures of MY babies, that I DIDN’T have, made me mad.

“TOM! THEYRE MY KIDS!! WHY DIDN’T YOU GIVE ME THOSE PHOTOS?!!”
“I DON’T KNOW WHATS SO WRONG WITH YOU NOT HAVING THEM?! ARN’T I ALLOWED TO HAVE MEMORIES WITHOUT YOU?!”
“YOU SICK SELFISH BASTERD! HOW DARE YOU!?”
“YOU B*TCH! ALL YOU THINK ABOUT IS YOURSELF AND WHAT EVERYONE ELSE THINKS ABOUT YOU!”
Everyone in the room was gaping, jaws on the floor as Tom and I b*tched at each other.
“GODDAMIT! YOU ARE SUCH A—
“WHAT THE H3LL IS YOUR F*CKING PROBLEM—
“I’LL TELL YOU WHAT THE PROBLEM IS YOU—
“DON’T GIVE ME THAT SH*T! YOU’RE JUST—
“I DON’T F*CKING CARE ANY—
“SHUT THE F*CK UP!” we both screamed at the same time, breathing heavily afterwards.
“Ummm…” Georg said from behind the magazine. “Can I say something?”
“NO!” We both yelled at him.
“Jeez..sorry…” he slid down in his chair. Bill was shocked. I don’t think he had ever seen that side of me before. Tom and I glared at each other. We had never, ever, argued this bad before.

No one talked. I glared at Tom.
“You. Come with me.” I said, walking out of the room. He followed, not wanting yo, bt not really having a choice. “The rest of you, stay here!”
I took him into a soundproof room and shut the door.
“Okay, tell me what the problem is. I know it’s more than me, or else we would have fought a long time ago.” I said, sitting on a chair. He slid down and sat against the wall opposite of me.
“I just…I see you and Bill…I see Juliet and Gustav…I see Georg and his girlfriend…and I think…’why can’t I have that?’.”
He said, sadly. All my anger for him went away.
He went on, “Gustav is talking about getting married, and so is Georg, and you and Bill already have kids…and I…I am the only one who has not changed…who is…alone.” A tear fell from his eye, but he brushed it away so quickly that it might as well have not even been there.
I got up and sat next to him. For the first time ever, I was comforting Tom, not the other way around.
“Tom…remember in New York…in the elevator?” I asked, hesitantly.
“No…wait…yes…” he said, looking at me. It was the only time I had had anything with Tom Kaulitz.
“Think back to it. If Bill and I hadn’t gone for each other…do you think that we might have had something? Would you have wanted it to be something? Would you have made it different than it usually is for you?” I asked, looking into his eyes, so much like Bill’s but so unlike.
I waited for him to answer. He wet his lips. I waited.
“Yes.”
“And…would you have wanted…kids?”
“Yes.”
“I’m sorry.” I looked at my hands.
He surprised me my taking my hand and looking at it, studying my fingers.
“I liked your song. And schon…” he looked at my face. “Don’t feel sorry for me. I am…I feel…complete happiness when I’m with Nox and Jett. Being with them…it just…lifts me up. I would do anything for them.”
“Tom…”
“Shhh…schon…just let me explain.”
“Okay.”
“I don’t think…that I will ever meet…someone that I will love as Bill loves you. I don’t think I’m destined to have a soulmate.” He smiled.
“But it’s okay, because there are other things to make up for it. Seeing my brother happy, seeing the twins yell and fight,” he looked at me. “Seeing you. You who are so perfectly fit into my life. I cannot imagine what it would be like without you. Do you realize…that if you had not spilled coffee on Bill in that airport…if not,” he laughed, “for that d*mn snowstorm, all of this…would never have happened.”

“It scares me when you talk like that.” I said, thinking what it would be like without my sons and shuddering.
“I’m sorry, I’m just…thinking.”
We sat there for a few more minutes. I nudged him with my elbow.
“I’m sorry for calling you a sick selfish bastard.”
He smiled. “That’s okay, I get called that all the time. Mostly by Bill.”
“And the girls in the hotel rooms?” I inquired.
“Why do you keep going back to that?”
“Sorry…I’m just a b*tchy evil frau that likes to screw with people’s self esteem.”
“Which you have now set to zero, by the way…”
“You’re welcome.”
He laughed.
“Wanna go back? Make sure they know we haven’t killed each other back here?” He said.
“Good idea. You’ll have to get your magazine back from Georg and Gustav…they seemed pretty interested in it when we left.”
He laughed.
“Why do you even read that anyway?” I wondered.
“What, you don’t like looking at pictures of sexy naked women?” he said, opening the door for me.
“Not, really, no.” I said, walking through it.
He sighed dramatically.
“Sad.”
“I do however, like looking at pictures of sexy naked men…or the actual man…” I said, thinking of Bill.
“You disgust me.” He said, faux-appallment on his face.
“It’s basically the same thing, Tomi.” I told him.
“No, it’s not. One of them has a—oof!” I had elbowed him in the stomach before he said anything that would have looked pretty weird as we walked into the relaxation room. Whispering broke off as we walked in.
I turned to Tom, trying to keep the smile off my face.
“I’m glad we could sort out our little problem, Tom.”
“I as well, Alec. I think we should go about as though nothing has happened.” He looked at me pointedly. I nodded.
“I agree.” I turned around, everyone was still wearing the shocked expressions that we had left them with. “Well boys…I need to get back to the home so that I can see my babies, and get packed. Anyone coming?”
Bill and Gustav came back with me. Tom had other things to do, like pick up a new guitar and such. And Georg had to get home and pack.
In the car, they kept trying to get me to talk, but I refused to crack.

We got back to the house, Adele, Nox and Jett and Simone, and Juliet were out on the patio, watching the boys play, talking. I waved to them. The boys came running towards me. Jett had a flower for me, and Nox had a picture. It touched my heart. I smothered them in kisses and hugs until they broke free and ran over to Bill and Gustav, hoping for presents.
Bill apologized profoundly to the boys, because he didn’t have a “pwesant” for them. Gustav went over to Juliet and kissed her, rubbing her shoulders and speaking to her in French. I still didn’t know how to speak it…yet… I smiled at Jules and blew her a kiss. I couldn’t chat at the moment. I needed to lay down.
And I wanted to cry, because I just don't know what the h.ell to do.

#2 LovesLuke

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Posted 15 March 2010 - 02:04 PM

OMG OMG OMG!!!!! It's amazing!! I love it Sis great freaking job! WUBS!!
Wub all my mommas and auntie!
Wub my sisters Lukehawk, Darcklight and our baby sis Sully!!!

#3 Sullomizer

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Posted 15 March 2010 - 03:53 PM

thanks love!! :thsmile-heartfillin:
And I wanted to cry, because I just don't know what the h.ell to do.

#4 darcklight

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Posted 15 March 2010 - 05:15 PM

Posted Image Posted Image Posted Image it is coming great. i loving it tons, sis!! awwww, poor tomi he, definately, needs some-one.....(where do i sign) Posted Image .
"I am not overly fond of what follows..." - Loki of Asgard.

"Tell me how bad I am, it makes me feel soooo good." - Lestat De Lioncourt.

"In a completely sane world, madness is the only freedom."- J. G. Ballard.

Proud member of the E.L.F (Elf Lover Fellowship)


I AM TEAM EVIL!

Wichapi nagin' wiyani': Star Shadow Woman, who is light in the dark for those she touches...bestowed upom me by Wicasa Etanhan Nagi & RachelEvans.
LAKOTA SIOUX

#5 Sullomizer

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Posted 15 March 2010 - 07:50 PM

heehee!
I know! i felt really bad writing it, but tom needs something other than his...shall we say...usual :cheeky:
And I wanted to cry, because I just don't know what the h.ell to do.

#6 darcklight

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Posted 15 March 2010 - 08:25 PM

View PostSullomizer, on 15 March 2010 - 07:50 PM, said:

heehee!
I know! i felt really bad writing it, but tom needs something other than his...shall we say...usual Posted Image


absolutly, n has to be sweet loving, hot and dark lol!!!!!
"I am not overly fond of what follows..." - Loki of Asgard.

"Tell me how bad I am, it makes me feel soooo good." - Lestat De Lioncourt.

"In a completely sane world, madness is the only freedom."- J. G. Ballard.

Proud member of the E.L.F (Elf Lover Fellowship)


I AM TEAM EVIL!

Wichapi nagin' wiyani': Star Shadow Woman, who is light in the dark for those she touches...bestowed upom me by Wicasa Etanhan Nagi & RachelEvans.
LAKOTA SIOUX

#7 Sullomizer

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Posted 15 March 2010 - 08:35 PM

hee right!!! :naughtywag_smilie:
And I wanted to cry, because I just don't know what the h.ell to do.

#8 darcklight

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Posted 15 March 2010 - 09:05 PM

View PostSullomizer, on 15 March 2010 - 08:35 PM, said:

hee right!!! Posted Image

totallly, hee
"I am not overly fond of what follows..." - Loki of Asgard.

"Tell me how bad I am, it makes me feel soooo good." - Lestat De Lioncourt.

"In a completely sane world, madness is the only freedom."- J. G. Ballard.

Proud member of the E.L.F (Elf Lover Fellowship)


I AM TEAM EVIL!

Wichapi nagin' wiyani': Star Shadow Woman, who is light in the dark for those she touches...bestowed upom me by Wicasa Etanhan Nagi & RachelEvans.
LAKOTA SIOUX





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